This International Dance Day, I’ll mostly be celebrating by dancing in my living room and kitchen. So not much different to the daily situation I and many other dancers have found themselves in for the past six weeks. Never have I been more grateful that there is only 5ft3 of me so that I can still get a bit of a shift on in reasonably small spaces!
What I also want to share today is a collection of thoughts on navigating this new landscape of the at home/ online dance practice that has been evolving. I’m not sure the thoughts are all fully formed yet, but it feels important to try and find the language to capture them. Like that moment in a dance class where a teacher asks if you have the urge or desire to repeat a movement phrase again, or whether you’re satisfied enough to move on. I feel like I’m processing so much through this moving I’m accessing at home, and now have a real urge to find the words to contribute to the dialogue of this moment in time before we ‘move on’. Hopefully, the words I find will make this experience somehow quantifiable beyond the transient nature of the movement itself.
Despite teaching and youth choreographic residencies being a big part of my portfolio of freelance work, I haven’t led any of my own online classes during this period. Rather it has been a privilege to have had the time to uncover and taste a small portion of content being delivered by other artists and companies across the globe. I came across a provocation this week asking whether you have taken a moment to pause during this crisis period to embrace the nature of a human ‘being’ rather than a tendency to be a human ‘doing’. I’m interested in this notion, as my circumstance (some honoured contracts and a family home of self-sufficient adults to exist in) has given me the opportunity to pause the ‘doing’ – my hand wasn’t forced into a reactive scenario of having to dive straight into leading class online with a whole new set of considerations to circumvent. Instead, my ‘doing’ has very much been able to embrace being a student and participant again, although this has raised the question for me of whether I am still maintaining my practice as an artist or collaborator…something to unpick a little later maybe.
So where to start? Perhaps with the scale of content that began being offered seemingly overnight across Instagram, Facebook, YouTube and Zoom with the added factor of having to figure out the equivalent times for classes in different time zones. It felt incredible and overwhelming in equal measure - to the extent that one of my friends felt the need to ‘protest’ by not partaking in any classes for several weeks. For me, this act of protest actually illustrates the power of choice that as a freelance member of the grassroots artistic workforce we can sometimes forget we hold. Particularly as a freelance performer, it is easy even in normal circumstances to feel powerless in the cycle of waiting - waiting for auditions to come up, waiting to find out whether you’re invited, waiting on a decision as to whether you might be offered a role post audition, waiting for official confirmation and a contract, it goes on. Recently, I’ve tried to acknowledge more the moments of ownership that I control within this cycle – where I am the one making the choice about who I want to apply to work with, or simply take class with. No freelancer will be a stranger to establishing their own schedule, whether it’s a quiet time of year that you want to use productively in lining up possible avenues for the future, or in shoehorning multiple projects into your diary at once during busier periods. Therein, for me, lay a quiet confidence in a skillset I already had – the challenge to come up with a new housebound routine of activity whilst still maintaining a sense of my own values and practice seemed entirely possible.
What have been some of the key factors I have considered when deciding which classes to invest my time, body and mind in? I suppose that I first needed to identify which spaces in my house would be most suited to me attempting class in – eyeing up the worktop and chairs in the kitchen as potential ballet barres, and the space (albeit it carpeted) in the living room which might allow for bigger movement phrases including elements of travel. With the rest of my family having picked out different rooms to complete their working from home activities in during the day, or in the case of a key worker still heading out to work, I would have freedom to use these communal spaces of kitchen and living room up until about 2.30pm each day (aside from lunchtime in the kitchen!). Having this limiting factor of time has been really helpful for me in terms of scheduling – live evening and weekend classes are out – particularly on Zoom. Classes which have been streamed live later in the afternoon and are saved on Instagram or Facebook though can be scheduled in to catch up on the following morning when I feel that makes sense.
Beyond time and space, what else did I take into consideration? At first, I think I was less aware of the motivation beyond the choices I was making. It was a learning curve, I certainly haven’t made all the right choices at the right time, but I’ve tried to stay inquisitive and responsive to what I feel my needs are from day to day (both emotional and physical). Sometimes it may be that familiarity has been a big driver – whether that be in movement form or that I’ve taken class before with this person and already have a connection with the teacher/company. Then there is the act of balancing the focus of different classes – noticing which are demanding fast pick-up of lots of material and perhaps offsetting with other classes where concepts and qualities are given more exploratory time. There is a difference in flow and connection/ companionship also to be noted between choosing classes filmed live or in a continuous shoot as opposed to pre-recorded with sections edited together. How visible I want to be has been another interesting concept to explore – knowing that no one can see you brings with it an opportunity for fearlessness but also lowers accountability. Even just engaging in the comments can up your visibility and accountability though, and gives a sense of sharing time and space with a connected group of people.
In the first few weeks, I found a lot of grounding in the twice a week schedule that Stopgap Dance Company put together consisting of interval training/ fitness followed by company class and then yoga. I loved the ease of being able to find all of these offerings in the same place lead by people I knew and felt I could trust my body with. Not only that, being an integrated company, Stopgap have already given a lot of thought to how movement can be translated between different bodies and ways of learning in their process – and so the act of open language, exploring themes in both improvisation and more form led combinations without too much pressure or opportunity for frustration to set in was already embedded. Their approach felt like a really positive way to get used to translating movement possibilities explored previously in the studio to home. I also think these classes were an excellent reminder of having a creative contribution that is welcome in class rather than placing too much focus on the body as an instrument – approaching class as a collaborator rather than a student. Stopgap’s class offer has shifted slightly from this initial format now but the grounding and stability that these classes hold for me in the landscape of my week, also gives me the energy to deviate and explore other classes in the wider dance community with the knowledge that they are holding and shaping a safe space for me to return to.
Across all of the classes I have been taking, one of the habits I have become most keen to avoid is having my focus glued to the screen the whole time. The first ballet barre that I did I swapped my chair from side to side so that I didn’t have to turn away from the teacher demonstrating, but I have since abandoned this practice and now happily turn away to dance on the second side without a visual prompt. This is a means of reminding myself that there is going to be a point in the future where the skill of trusting yourself to dance without copying will still be important. I also quite enjoy encountering technical difficulties as a reminder to not become too reliant on the person on the screen – whether that be a teacher’s child running in to disrupt an exercise, the recording phone falling in a plant pot so the visual goes, or synchronisation issues with sound meaning that if you want to dance in time with the music you need to dance in canon with the teacher! If you are teaching a class and find yourself encountering issues such as these, please know that they are often a welcome challenge and bring a smile to the face - don’t panic or berate yourself unnecessarily.
One experience which was an unexpected delight and freed me from the screen entirely came in the form of an audio movement class from Barrowland Ballet. Guided by Aya Kobayashi’s voice paired with music from Nicolette Macleod I felt like I could access a space where I had clear ownership of my whole body including my eyes to move freely and inform my decision making in the moment.
My final thought to ponder is whether this new online live class offering has any life after lockdown and social distancing, when studio classes are rendered possible again. Nothing can replace, the shared group energy exchange, learning through physical touch, plus training possibilities to fly, travel and roll in a way that will serve dancers eating up the space on expansive stages, which a live studio class provide. Access wise though, this online experience does provide both physical training and connectivity where before there were barriers. I know several of my friends and colleagues who have had children have commented that they would have loved classes like these to keep in touch with the sector and their bodies during maternity leave. Even location wise, as a freelancer living outside of London the energy and cost of getting into London at peak times when most professional classes are offered is a barrier to getting the kind of access to class I’m experiencing at home right now. So perhaps today is a good day to plant a seed that live online classes from and with household settings in mind (which can be streamed for anything between 24hours and a week after they go out) would be a lovely addition to help sustain freelance dance artists going forwards….